Break Hips, Not Hearts – Funny Senior Tee
Still smooth, just slightly more fragile. This funny senior tee is for the flirtatious, fearless, and fabulously aging legend who may walk a little slower but still turns heads (and occasionally risks turning an ankle).
Perfect as sarcastic senior merch for charming the nurses, stealing the spotlight at family gatherings, or winking your way through bingo night. Whether you’re reminiscing about your wild days or making new memories with a side of calcium supplements, this dark humor shirt says you’ve still got it, you’re just a little more strategic about getting out of a chair.
A hilarious retirement gift or funny aging t-shirt for the unfiltered romantic who believes hips may crack, but their charm is unbreakable.
Why You’ll Love It
• Perfect for seniors, retirees, and aging legends who embrace humor, flirtation, and flair
• A funny and relatable dark humor shirt that celebrates style, sass, and senior independence
• Soft, comfortable fabric ideal for everyday wear
• Sarcastic senior merch that makes a memorable retirement gift, birthday surprise, or bingo-night conversation starter
• Great for family gatherings, nursing home shenanigans, or anytime you want to turn heads
Product features
- Knit without side seams for reduced fabric waste and enhanced design.
- Ribbed-knit collar retains shape and adds elasticity for all-day wear.
- Shoulder tape stabilizes seams, ensuring durability and comfort.
- Crafted from durable, smooth 100% ring-spun cotton for a lightweight feel.
- Made ethically from US-grown cotton, Oeko-Tex certified for safety.
Care instructions
- Do not dryclean
- Do not bleach
- Tumble dry: low heat
- Iron, steam or dry: low heat
- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), with similar colors
| |
XS |
S |
M |
L |
XL |
2XL |
3XL |
4XL |
5XL |
| Width, in |
16.00 |
18.00 |
20.00 |
22.00 |
24.00 |
26.00 |
28.00 |
30.00 |
32.00 |
| Length, in |
27.00 |
28.00 |
29.00 |
30.00 |
31.00 |
32.00 |
33.00 |
34.00 |
35.00 |
| Sleeve length, in |
7.99 |
8.23 |
8.50 |
8.74 |
9.02 |
9.25 |
9.49 |
9.72 |
9.96 |
| Size tolerance, in |
1.50 |
1.50 |
1.50 |
1.50 |
1.50 |
1.50 |
1.50 |
1.50 |
1.50 |
